Friday, 12 May 2017

Too Much Time On Their Hands

Spare Us

The Chattersphere is all agog and aghast at the firing of James Comey, former FBI Director.  Conspiracies, and conspiracy theories abound.  The funniest was to watch Democratic pollies prove their exceptional twinkle-toes skill as they moved rapidly from yesterday declaiming Comey, demanding his sacking, only then to pirouette on a sixpence, and commence decrying Trump for having the gall to heed their demands.

Then, they began to advance all sorts of conspiracy theories as to why Trump acted so precipitously.

Members on the right also posed many questions, pointing to Trump's firing making no sense.  There has to be something deeper, more opaque, more sinister going on.  Charles Krauthammer said Trump's firing of the Director was "inexplicable".

In times like this, we need to be reminded of Occam's Razor--the general rule that the simple explanation is likely to be nearer the truth.  And the simplest explanation in this case?
 Philip Giraldi, a former CIA officer, advanced the following account:  "I believe that the simplest explanation for the firing of Comey is the most likely: Donald Trump doesn’t like him much and doesn’t trust him at all."

Behold the beauty and elegance of Occam's Razor.  There is something majestic about adding 1 plus 1 and coming up with 2.  However, the febrile swamp of US national politics would add 1 plus 1 and come up with 65 to the twentieth power, with half a dozen "on the other hands" in tow, just in case.   It keeps the Chatterers in jobs, at least.

Occam's Razor advises us that the simplest explanation is the most likely.  We confess that in this case Giraldi's explanation is both elegant and most compelling.

But it is true that explanations which are both elegant and compelling tend to be less entertaining to the prurient mind.   So, to meet popular demand, we offer a "Deep State" explanation for Comey's termination.  Few are aware that when Comey was recently in New Zealand attending a conference of "Five Eyes" member states, he received a death threat.  Yes, we kid you not.  The issuer of the threat was a sleeper agent of Russia, who has been embedded in a provincial town in the North Island of New Zealand for decades, at the behest of Putin, naturally.  Trump, having been informed of these Dark Arts, concluded that his mate, Vlad the Impaler was more seriously offended at America than he had realised and it would be prudent to offer up a token sacrifice to appease Vlad.  Exit Comey.

How about that?  Worth a front page spread in the New York Times, we reckon.

Beat that one, Messrs Krauthammer and Schumer.  Oh, and by the way, why is it that so many of the United States political establishment have German names?  Ever wondered about that?

Come back, please William of Occam.  How we miss you.  How we need you.

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