Club Memberships Must be Paid

Second Rate Kabuki Theatre

It seems inevitable that New Zealand will be off on another military adventure to the other side of the world because . . . because . . . because it's inevitable, that's why.

We were cynically amused the other day when some folk (a politician and a few odd bloggers) were offended when a member of Britain's ruling class urbanely suggested that New Zealand needs to send troops to combat ISIS because it belongs to a club.

Mr Dunne also launched a stinging attack on comments made in New Zealand last week by British Foreign Secretary Philip Hammond when he said: "Frankly we've got used to New Zealand being there alongside us, alongside the US, the UK, Australia, as part of the family." . . . .  Mr Dunne, a minister and the leader of United Future, described Mr Hammond as a "patronising figure from abroad loftily telling us we are in the club, we are part of the family and it would be lovely to have you along for the next round of unmitigated slaughter".

But the British Foreign Secretary was telling the truth.
  For well nigh the entire history of New Zealand's existence as a nation we have relied upon the military help and assistance of other nations, namely the other "club" members--the US, the UK, and Australia. New Zealand's defence doctrine can be summarised in one word. Others.  That's how we have prepared and planned to defend ourselves.  By reliance upon other nations coming to our defence.  So, when the Others call and beckon, for help in their wars, we dutifully must come, or risk our entire national defence capability.

So politician, Peter Dunne and all others offended at the "patronising" comments of Philip Hammond should take a deep breath and stare dolefully into a mirror for twenty minutes, intoning the mea culpa,  "I am a hypocrite, a perverse hypocrite," five hundred times.  All New Zealand governments in living memory have waged mighty wars in this country on poverty, unemployment, drugs, domestic abuse, and crime.  They have expended  billions upon billions of dollars in these campaigns.  We have been too exercised waging these wars to have sufficient funds to pay for even the most rudimentary military hardware, let alone more than a couple of thousand soldiers.  We have arrogantly expected that the taxpayers of the other club members would continue to pay for our defence should need ever arise, expending their military hardware and their soldiers in our defence. 

We would be so bold as to make the following prediction: if an enemy as ruthless and organised as ISIS were to invade New Zealand all resistance would have been crushed within twenty-four hours.  Only distance and our geographical isolation protects us--and the implicit threat that the club members would come to our defence.

So, New Zealand has no choice but to send troops when club members call for us to do so.  It's irresponsible.  It's perverse.  But it's the price to be paid for the equally irresponsible and perverse Others Defence Doctrine which this nation has opted for since its existence.  The Piper will always need to be paid, in the end.  In this case the Piper is our military familia, and the Godfather has just made a call.  Dunne's moaning about it is little more than tasteless kabuki theatre.  It's what the overwhelming mass of New Zealand citizens have always preferred to do and be.

How outrageous for Dunne to criticise the very essence of the Others Doctrine.  It's the only real national defence capability we have.  And every so often the Piper will want to be paid.  Fair enough. 

You, Peter Dunne have supported the doctrine all your political life.  Spare us your faux-outrage.