Ironic Indeed

The Largest Protest in US History

If this post is full of typos, it's only because we our keyboard skills are being discombobulated by laughter. It was billed as "the largest mass civil disobedience for climate in U.S. history". The whole idea was not to condemn or oppose the Obama administration's Canute-like intent to reduce carbon emissions. No, Obama is viewed as "one of us." Rather, the tactic was to demonstrate mass grass roots support for what the President is proposing to do. It was heavily promoted--this chic political event. The luminaries were all behind it.

The target was the

Capitol Power Plant, a 99-year-old coal-burning plant, situated blocks from Capitol Hill, which heats and cools the U.S. Capitol. (It hasn't generated electricity since 1952.) Organizers say the plant "symbolizes the stranglehold coal has over our government and future" and the nation’s wrong-headed climate policy. They also say:

"As with Ghandi’s walk for independence and Martin Luther King’s march for equal rights, history now calls on people of conscience to peacefully take a principled stand on global warming."

So we have Ghandi and Martin Luther King evoked. But wait--former assistant to King Ahab, Al Gore also threw his weight behind it. He had been musing while shaving with his carbon-friendly cutthroat razor, that he could not understand "why there aren’t rings of young people blocking bulldozers and preventing them from constructing coal-fired power plants." Well, when he-who-is-a-prophet says that, it is a clear challenge, and his faithful sought to deliver. They would organise the "the largest mass civil disobedience rally for the climate in U.S. history". That near-moribund symbolic coal station and all its kin and descendants would be unable to withstand the political maelstrom about descend from the climatically changed heavens.

But wait--there's more. They had the blessing of more patron saints. No lesser luminaries than Susan Sarandon and James Hansen were going to be there, whipping up the faithful to a frenzy of civil disobedience. Ninety different environmental groups endorsed the protest. Greenpeace--ah what would a global warming protest be without Greenpeace--said the protest was timely. The US needs, apparently, to take large steps in combating carbon in the atmosphere to build political momentum for the big UN Climate change conference in Copenhagen this December. It's urgent, folks. There is nothing like a bit of urgency to stir up the troops.

And the outcome? You have guessed it. Sadly, the globally warmed, carbon inundated climate refused to co-operated. Instead a huge blizzard dumped snow everywhere. Too cold for the protesters. It is estimated that only about 500 turned up. But local officials were deeply concerned that the coal fired power station--the object of the protesters' political ire--would be structurally compromised by the collective shivering of the protesters as they chained themselves to the gates of the plant.

But the danger passed. The protesters lost their ardour when they heard that Queen Jezebel could not make it. Nancy Pelosi had agreed to come and whip up the troops. But, alas, she did not appear. Why? Loss of zeal, you wonder. No, nothing so exotic.

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) had to cancel an appearance Monday at a global warming rally in Washington, D.C., that was hit by a snowstorm because her flight was delayed, her office told CNSNews.com.

Brianna Cayo-Cotter, the spokesman for the Energy Action Coalition that held the rally, told a group of reporters that she had been in contact with Pelosi and that her flight had been delayed because of inclement weather.

A blizzard Sunday night and early Monday morning blanketed the nation’s capital with snow, causing events to be cancelled and delayed across the city.

Sso Jezebel could not get into DC because it was too cold. Look, guys. Can't you get this right. Clearly Baal or Gaia, or whoever else you worship, is mad at you. Or maybe he/she/it was taking a "comfort stop" at the time. Or maybe they had been lulled to sleep by soporific carbon vapours. It's time to worship a bit harder, get a bit more frenzied, maybe something dramatic like dancing around in a circle, gashing yourself with sharp stones and razored flails. Your political credibility is now cryogenically frozen. At least your gods could have co-operated with sufficiently warm temperatures to enable you to protest against the warming of the globe. But no.

Our advice. Don't try another stunt like this until you are sure your gods are awake, are properly appeased, and paying attention. If you don't you may end up facing the wrath of those descended from Elijah.